Stepmoms can often feel isolated when it comes to their challenges. No one else in the family has quite the same perspective on the dynamics at work when the group is all together. But if the father does not have full custody, it's highly possible that he struggles with some of the same issues as the stepmom.
Any married couple should approach tough issues as a team, but this is especially true when dealing with "his kids" who may not feel at home because they spend most of their time with their biological mother. As a stepmom, I am aware of some of difficulties my husband faces such as, child support, loss of control when the kids are with their mother, limited quality time, etc. But how much does he know about my struggles as a stepmom?
In an earlier post, I mentioned a book that has helped me, but I'm hoping it will help my husband as well. He is now reading it in order to gain a better understanding of what I go through as a stepmom. I am so blessed that he is willing to explore this subject further. Oh sure, we've discussed this topic before, but as he reads about others in the same proverbial boat, he'll realize that it's not "just me" and that I'm not just getting bent out of shape for no good reason. The more he understands what it's like for me, the easier it will be for him to help me become the best stepmom I can be.
Whether you decide to research together, or simply discuss things over a cup of coffee, you should do whatever it takes to help your teammate, because having a successful stepfamily is much tougher than winning any game!
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