Properly Folded Linens & Other Things That Really Don't Matter

Warning: If you're a bit obsessive-compulsive about your housework, you may not want to read this!

As a woman and a homebody, I understand the need to insist that all chores around the house be done a certain way. But here's a little secret: It doesn't have to be that way! In fact, you will likely get more help if you loosen the reigns a bit and give your stepkids the freedom to do things their way.

Let's face it; the idea of asking your stepkids to do chores can often be a dicey game anyway. It won't kill you to resist the urge to hover over them, making sure they're "doing it right".

After all, if the goal of washing dishes is to get the dishes clean, what does it matter how they do it?

Preparing for the Positive

When we have experienced rough patches with our stepkids in the past, it can be easy to dread future visits and all the things that might go wrong.

They won't like what we're having for supper.
They won't enjoy the activities we have planned.
They'll get upset if we enforce rules they don't have at their other house.
They'll be resentful that they can't be with their friends during our weekend.

Truth be told, no one can predict the future when it comes to stepfamilies. So why start the visit off with a negative mindset? Maybe the kids have had a stressful week (or two) and they're ready for a change of pace. Whatever your mood is when they arrive, the kids will pick up on it.

Although you have no control over how they react to your mood, you can certainly tip the scales in favor of a good--if not perfect--visit by developing a positive mindset before they come.